Do you guys remember this song? This is one of my favorite songs! I dedicate this to all of my cyberspace and real-life friends, keep smiling, keep shining, knowing you can count on me through good and bad times. I will be on your side forever more. I love you!
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
When love hurts part 4: Unrequited love
Dear EA
Today my heart is heavy. While I realized that it could happen I hoped that it never would, things with us have changed. Your calls which started off as plentiful, sweet and full of love are now few, far between and cool. That loving, encouraging, funny EA of old is gone and I am mourning that loss. My heart is heavy. However, God is the ultimate healer of broken hearts. I cast all my cares on him for he cares for me.
You met me at a time when I was emotionally spent and you loved me. You loved me when I needed it the most and had nothing to give in return. I believe that now you are emotionally spent and have nothing left to give. I will not take your “abandonment” personally. I do however want to be there for you like how you were there for me. I imagine that what you need most right now is a good friend who will love you, support you, and encourage you unconditionally without any expectations. I want to be that friend to you. I really do. I just need to get over myself. As the Bible puts it “kill my flesh”
I pray to God to help me love you with his love which is perfect not with my love which is moody, fickle and often conditional. I feel like I have had this test before and failed it…God’s giving me another chance.
I am inspired by the men in my life who have loved me even when the love was unreturned. The Mario’s, Ron’s, Tyrone’s, and Turner’s of my life. Even when all hope was gone for an us, even when it took me months to return a phone call or e-mail they loved me. They taught me about the meaning of love. For that I will be forever grateful.
True love requires sacrifice. I desire to sacrifice myself for you. And if I get nothing from you in return I will still be grateful because you will have taught me how to love.
The joy of the Lord is my strength.
Today my heart is heavy. While I realized that it could happen I hoped that it never would, things with us have changed. Your calls which started off as plentiful, sweet and full of love are now few, far between and cool. That loving, encouraging, funny EA of old is gone and I am mourning that loss. My heart is heavy. However, God is the ultimate healer of broken hearts. I cast all my cares on him for he cares for me.
You met me at a time when I was emotionally spent and you loved me. You loved me when I needed it the most and had nothing to give in return. I believe that now you are emotionally spent and have nothing left to give. I will not take your “abandonment” personally. I do however want to be there for you like how you were there for me. I imagine that what you need most right now is a good friend who will love you, support you, and encourage you unconditionally without any expectations. I want to be that friend to you. I really do. I just need to get over myself. As the Bible puts it “kill my flesh”
I pray to God to help me love you with his love which is perfect not with my love which is moody, fickle and often conditional. I feel like I have had this test before and failed it…God’s giving me another chance.
I am inspired by the men in my life who have loved me even when the love was unreturned. The Mario’s, Ron’s, Tyrone’s, and Turner’s of my life. Even when all hope was gone for an us, even when it took me months to return a phone call or e-mail they loved me. They taught me about the meaning of love. For that I will be forever grateful.
True love requires sacrifice. I desire to sacrifice myself for you. And if I get nothing from you in return I will still be grateful because you will have taught me how to love.
The joy of the Lord is my strength.
To my earth angel*
*Biblically there is no such thing as an earth angel but I just don't know how else to describe him...
Dear Mr. EA
I call you my angel of hope because you have made it possible for me to believe in the possibility of love. I know that the way I feel around you is the way I should feel. I feel like you get me. You understand my imperfections but do not hold them against me. You think I am great, all that and a bag of chips. That is how it should be.
At this point I have no idea what will become of us. I might leave San Diego and never see you again. You might fall in love with another girl next week. On the other hand we might fall in love, f___ like jackrabbits, have some cute babies and live happily ever after. All these things exist within the realm of possibilities. I welcome all of these possibilities because I am confident that in the end all things will work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to his purpose. One thing I do know for sure is that I will always be grateful to you for being my angel for these few days. Please know that I appreciate you.
I sent him a card that said the following (it's important to let people know you appreciate them):
I just wanted to express my gratitude to you for helping me believe again in the possibility of love. Irrespective of what happens after today, please know that I will always be grateful to you for being my angel for these few days. You are appreciated.
Rest assured that all things will work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to his purpose. Your best days are still to come.
1 Corinthians 2:9 says, "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him" (NIV)
Keep believing, God is faithful.
Dear Mr. EA
I call you my angel of hope because you have made it possible for me to believe in the possibility of love. I know that the way I feel around you is the way I should feel. I feel like you get me. You understand my imperfections but do not hold them against me. You think I am great, all that and a bag of chips. That is how it should be.
At this point I have no idea what will become of us. I might leave San Diego and never see you again. You might fall in love with another girl next week. On the other hand we might fall in love, f___ like jackrabbits, have some cute babies and live happily ever after. All these things exist within the realm of possibilities. I welcome all of these possibilities because I am confident that in the end all things will work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to his purpose. One thing I do know for sure is that I will always be grateful to you for being my angel for these few days. Please know that I appreciate you.
I sent him a card that said the following (it's important to let people know you appreciate them):
I just wanted to express my gratitude to you for helping me believe again in the possibility of love. Irrespective of what happens after today, please know that I will always be grateful to you for being my angel for these few days. You are appreciated.
Rest assured that all things will work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to his purpose. Your best days are still to come.
1 Corinthians 2:9 says, "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him" (NIV)
Keep believing, God is faithful.
Been so long
I have been around the world and back again. This weekend will mark the eighth consecutive weekend that I have been away from home.
God has been so good to me, so good. In ways greater than I ever could imagine. He has showered me with blessings, shown me his favor and put some divine connections in my life.
Just last night a man I had never met before saw it fit to give me the best rack of lamb that I have ever had in my life before (for free)...and no it wasn't a date...and no he didn't ask for my number...and no I didn't even have to eat them in his presence. He gave them to me free and clear with no strings attached and boy were they good!!!
God is good. His word is true he gives us the desires of our heart often times when we least expect it! I am getting excited just thinking about it.
My life has been so fantastic since Mr J has been out of it. I got my hair did and a massage. I look good I feel good. I even got a prestigious national medical association (only by his grace)!
And I had the opportunity to apply for an internship to put on a health TV show that will help me reach millions of people with messages of hope. How cool would that be?! The verdict is out in May.
So that has been my life over the past few months. I have written a few things but have not posted too many.
I feel led to share today. Read on!
Be blessed.
God has been so good to me, so good. In ways greater than I ever could imagine. He has showered me with blessings, shown me his favor and put some divine connections in my life.
Just last night a man I had never met before saw it fit to give me the best rack of lamb that I have ever had in my life before (for free)...and no it wasn't a date...and no he didn't ask for my number...and no I didn't even have to eat them in his presence. He gave them to me free and clear with no strings attached and boy were they good!!!
God is good. His word is true he gives us the desires of our heart often times when we least expect it! I am getting excited just thinking about it.
My life has been so fantastic since Mr J has been out of it. I got my hair did and a massage. I look good I feel good. I even got a prestigious national medical association (only by his grace)!
And I had the opportunity to apply for an internship to put on a health TV show that will help me reach millions of people with messages of hope. How cool would that be?! The verdict is out in May.
So that has been my life over the past few months. I have written a few things but have not posted too many.
I feel led to share today. Read on!
Be blessed.
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